Movie of the Day – Hard Target

I can’t help it, another Jean-Claude Van Damme movie and one that is directed by slow motion, flying dove loving director John Woo.  Hard Target split kicks its way on this post with the Big Easy mullet and durable, denim shirt that Van Damme sports.  It’s another one of those USA Network showings that you can catch between showings of the Westminster Kennel Dug Club Show and WWE, but shit does this movie rock.  So much like Face/Off, I assume you know what John Woo is all about, duel pistols, a lot of unnecessary diving and rolls and the gun play.  So get ready for the most dangerous movie of all time, Hard Target.

Jean-Claude Van Damme as Chance Boudreaux, a down-and-out Cajun merchant seaman, who, after saving a young woman, Natasha Binder (Yancy Butler), from a gang of thugs on the streets of New Orleans, agrees to help her search for her father (Chuck Pfarrer), a homeless Vietnam vet. They locate local businessman Randall Poe (Elliott Keener), for whom the vet had been working, and learn that her father has become a victim of wealthy sportsman Emil Fouchon (Lance Henriksen), who, along with his cronies, hunts homeless men as a form of recreation. After Fouchon finds out that the girl is investigating the murder of her father, he arranges for she and Chance to be ambushed, but they manage to escape into the backwoods of Louisiana — his stomping grounds. Realizing he needs to regroup, Fouchon assembles a private army to invade the bayous. They track the pair to the rustic cabin of Chance’s Uncle Douvee (Wilford Brimley), and the real fireworks begin. ~ Michael Costello, Rovi

That’s right, Wilford Brimley is in this movie and dealing death blows that Diabetes couldn’t do.  He plays the moonshiner, bow and arrow slinging, backwoods cajun that is as deadly as Van Damme’s split kick.  Also Lance Henriksen being in this movie doesn’t hurt it at all since he gets to wield a badass gun and shoots the head off of a snake.

While I jest and interject snark into the whole post, this is actually a stellar action movie.  The human hunting angle is great as it keeps the action moving and the final showdown in the warehouse is the grand set piece that Woo is known for.  Listen, if you are a guy, you have already seen this movie.  In fact you can probably just turn on the tv now and watch it, but if you haven’t seen it and a fan of action movies, this is the one you want to watch.

Did I mention Van Damme knocks out a snake with a punch?

Movie of the Day – Bloodsport

KUMITE!  KUMITE!  KUMITE!  KUMITE!  Hell yes son, time to man up and get ready for the fight of your life.  The Muscles from Brussels, Jean-Claude Van Damme takes on the underground world of illegal fighting competition.  You can bet he will be doing the splits all to the way to finals to take on a stereotypical bad guy who rules the roost and is reigning champion.  So get your ass ready for some kick ass fight scenes and stupid, pointless dialogue scenes.

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Movie of the Day – Street Fighter

Alright seriously, what kid in the early 90′s wasn’t excited when they found out that Hollywood was going to turn the now iconic arcade fighting game, Street Fighter, into a major motion picture?  Don’t lie cause you were all excited for this ultimate in cinematic enjoyment.  How pumped were that the “Muscles from Brussels” Jean-Claude Van Damme was going to be high-kicking his way on to the big screen as Guile?  You are lying to your past kid self if you  weren’t excited that the dude from Hard Target, Timecop, Bloodsport, Lionheart, Double Impact and Universal Soldier was going to be playing the best character in a fighting game ever (fuck you and your love of Ryu or Ken).  The best kicker of this cinematic masterpiece was that it was being directed by Steven E. de Souza, who written some of my favorite action movies of all time (Die Hard and Die Hard 2, Running Man, and Commando).  This movie blew my mind back when I was 10, but now looking back on it as a man in his mid-twenties, it fucking sucks.  My nostalgia and childhood feels like it was taken out back to an alley and beaten mercilessly.

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