Movie Review – Star Trek Into Darkness

If you would have told me about four years ago that Star Trek was going to become one of the biggest franchises again, I would have laughed it off.  I mean the franchise itself, in film form, has existed since 1979 with “Star Trek: The Motion Picture”, which was just basically money shots of the Enterprise and some deep insight into the existence of life while battling a giant space cloud.  But decades later and many more Star Trek films, either TOS or TNG (The Original Series or The Next Generation), the luster of the Enterprise needed a new, shinier coat for audiences that weren’t just fans of the series.  J.J. Abrams undertook a massive attempt with his reboot of the long running franchise in 2009 with “Star Trek”.  A lens flare filled visual spectacle that essentially made Star Trek cool to like, at the behest of nerds around the world.  It made the series popular once again and was a critical success.  So the rollicking, humor, action oriented Star Trek had a lot to live up to with a sequel that was 4 years in the making.  “Star Trek Into Darkness” boldly promises to take us into darker territories with its foreboding title and higher stakes, a promise it fully delivers with warp speed.

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Movie of the Day – A Woman, A Gun, and A Noodle Shop

Have you ever thought to yourself that while you were watching the sublime Coen Brothers film “Blood Simple” that there would be a different take on the film?  Maybe wondering what it would look like if say a famous international director decided to pay tribute to the movie with his/her vision of the story line?  Well folks your prayers are answered as Zhagng Yimou decided  that Blood Simple needed to be remade with some Asian period piece flair and today I will talk about the exciting and wonderful remake, A Woman, A Gun and A Noodle Shop.

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Movie of the Day – Ator The Fighting Eagle

What if I told you that Europe has its own Conan the Barbarian series?  What if I told you this series was mildly successful enough that it warranted three additional sequels to its name?  What if I also told you that each of the films in the series were also as ridiculous and cheesy as the original Ator?  Well folks, thanks to the Italians and the success of Conan the Barbarian that one faithful month in 1982, the Italians decided they needed to cash in on the who swords and sorcery game with their answer Conan.  What we got is nothing short of terrible, but truly amazing z-movie knock-offs.

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Movie of the Day – The Expendables 2

God I am having one of those days where I just need a loud, senseless movie to just escape into and wouldn’t you know it, here we go.  A movie that brought together so much manliness, explosions, blood, and a cobbling of all the action movies in existence, The Expendables 2 was enjoyable in the way that I enjoy Commando or Demolition Man or that one movie where Van Damme plays twins who fight some sort of drug lord cause that was the thing you did in the early 90s.  This wasn’t a great movie by means, but satiated that need to see wonderfully over-the-top violence and action scenes.

I will admit, I was a little displeased as to how both of The Expendable movies turned out.  The story was crap, didn’t care much about the characters and too many callbacks and in-jokes between the characters that harkened to their previous roles.  Then again, I am watching an action movie that is supposed to be a throwback to the uber violent 80s and 90s action movie which is where most, if not all the stars found their fame in.  The movie is just fun to watch in the brainless sense, so take it at face value with this movie.  It is fun to see all these action stars in one place, just wiping out armies that could probably occupy a medium size country and the winks to the audience can be a bit charming if not serve to remind you that you are watching a ridiculous movie.

I can’t hate on it too much, since I did give it a middle of the road score.  I knew what I was getting into and frankly that is all I can ask for with this movie.  Loud explosions, lots of grunting, plenty of action and nothing else.

Below is a snippet from my original review and a link to the whole thing.  Enjoy!

The story of The Expendables 2 see’s….you know what, fuck it.  Who honestly gives a shit about the story for this movie?  I am sure that Stallone sat down and pulled out his signature designed, limited edition Montegrappa Pen entitled “Chaos” and churned out a story by cobbling together all the plot and story points from past films.  A little Rambo here, a sprinkle of Commando there, some Hard Target right in this area and then a climatic orgy of bullets and explosions.  He sent that script to the studio’s, they pass out from sensory overload and Stallone took the script, loaded a shotgun full of his Montegrappa Pens and shot that script to shit.  Seriously, I can’t stop talking about this pen cause it’s pretty much the greatest thing in the world that he had to show it off in the movie itself.  I mean, fucking look at it!

Full review here!

Movie of the Day – Invasion U.S.A.

Everyone knows that Chuck Norris’ chief export is pain.  So buckle the fuck up cause he is going to be delivering a whole boatload of pain in one of the most kick ass action flicks out there, all due to the fine folks at Cannon and Golan Globus films.  It’s Invasion USA!!!

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Movie of the Day – Penitentiary 3

Ah the Cannon Group, a film company that’s only purpose to churn out mid to low grade movies with bottom of the barrel scripts and basically turning shit into unadulterated gold.  They are the group responsible for movie like Bloodsport, Invasion USA, Breakin’ and Rockula.  During the heyday of the 80s, they paired with Golan Globus to release one of the single most amazing prison films ever made folks.  I am talking better than any other prison movie that has been released or will ever be released.  After the jump you will see why.

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Movie of the Day – Blade II

So good and campy that I had to go ahead with the second one in the franchise.  I certainly won’t be pushing any praise on that craptastic third Blade film, Blade Trinity, cause fuck that sucked.  No I want to go into the often crapped on, but ultimately pleasing sequel to the breakout hit Blade with the sequel directed by Guillermo Del Toro.  Yeah, he ended up making a wildly satisfying flick that gave us more of what made the original fun to watch, but neglected to give us anything in terms of plot, dialogue, or anything else that could have made this flick.  But fuck all that, lets get to the Daywalker goodness of vampire hunting.

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Movie of the Day – Blade

So Wesley Snipes got out of prison this past week, which means a Blade 4 or whatever is probably going to be in the works as we speak.  Now I liked the first two Blade pics, not the last one with Ryan Reynolds and something about a super vampire or whatever, but the Blade series has always been this campy, fetish style horror, action flick that delivered on what it wanted and that is about all you can ask for.  I am not looking for something deep or prophetic, just Blade going around town, killing vampires, playing techno music and always betting on black.

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Movie of the Day – Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2

I wanted to re-up this old, old review of this movie for today, mainly cause I am going to be hosting a small little gathering at my place in which we watch Harry Potter movies and drink Harry Potter inspired cocktails.  Yeah, that’s about the best thing in the world in my eyes, watching a great series (or whatever we manage to get through) and drinking alcohol.  Probably one of the reasons why I work at the Drafthouse.  Anyways, when I was going back through my old reviews for the site, which I promise myself I will be writing more as I go out to the theater a lot more, I am rather shocked by the sheer length of my reviews.  Man I was relatively verbose back then and probably still am.  Oh well.

Well today’s post is the final chapter of the series and in my eyes, a very fitting end to the franchise.  I could do without the prologue in which the kids dress up as adults cause that took me right out of the ending itself, but a climatic battle scene, wizard on wizard action and a culmination of years of setup and story to get to the final showdown.  Yeah, I can say that it is one of the best of the series and the most compelling with the stakes laid out on the table. 

So enjoy my original, long ass review and have a good day,

The final chapter in the series ends where it all began over a decade ago.  There is a lot invested in the final film of the series.  All the characters, all the stories, and all the buildup to the end is laid out for us in Part 2 of the Deathly Hallows.  I have been a fan of the series since the beginning and seeing this general progression in the series tone and subject matter is fascinating.  I have watch the characters grow older, the tone grow darker and that slow push to the final confrontation is what we have all been waiting for.  So does the final act of the series live up to the build up that audiences have been waiting a decade to see?  If you read the book series, then you already know what to expect.  For fans of the film, it is about having a solid closure to the series.  Overused phrase up ahead…lets make magic!

Full review here.

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Movie of the Day – Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn

This isn’t so much a movie as it is a web series that makes us yearn for this to be made into a movie.  Sometimes, this is all we are going to get and we better like it.  The Halo series is, I better tread lightly here so as not to offend fanboys and arm-chair warriors of the internet, a great series.  I remember many a lan parties where I would get together with friends and play pistols on Hang Em High or whatever other maps there were.  I remember the story of Halo, right up till I stopped playing after Halo 3.  Sure some will decry that I am not a true fan to give this movie a fair shake or be well versed to accurately talk about the series itself as anything Halo means the legion of fanboys come out to defend it.  Well they can screw off as my movie of the day post is more about bringing attention to some stuff I like to watch and this certainly was one of them.  It makes me wish that an actual Halo movie be made, but that probably won’t happen.  So enjoy the series and see what there is after the jump.

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